A few weeks ago, my friend Jason and I he went to dinner. We discussed gossip at work and whether we should share Ted Lasso and rigatoni, and then there were the breakups of the conversation. We’ve been friends for 20 years, so we’ve helped each other through closures of heart-to-heart relationships. Suddenly, he said something profound …
“When someone’s heart is disappointed, they want someone who is as accurate as their profile – the same look, the same sense of humor. When they imagine the future, they only want it that people. But you have to realize: you will never find the same person with the same attributes, but you will find them someone who makes you feel the same way“.
How nice is that? And which is true.
When I was 22, my college boyfriend and I broke up because he was in Michigan and I was in New York and neither of us could start moving. It broke my heart. I was convinced that I would never be happy again; I mean, how could I ever love anyone else? Its holes! Her sweaters! After the joke, I was able to look around the party to make sure I was laughing. But, after being a little sad, I felt good again. Other relationships came and went, and a few years later I met Alex. And, you’ll never believe it: it made me feel good in the same way. Better alone. And safer. And even more so in love.
Jason, you wicked genius! Thank you for sharing this view.
Thoughts? What advice would you add? Have you experienced a breakup recently – or are you experiencing it right now? Well, I send you the biggest hug !!! It’s the worst !!!
(Photo from the movie Someone Great.)