The first day, I got angry …
I asked Alex to pile up some dirty cloths in the kitchen and throw them in the washing machine. (I usually do, but I was busy.) Of course, he said yes. But that night, they were still there. The next morning, there was a pile. That afternoon: you know the drill. My thought process? I always wash my handkerchiefs! Why does he continue to forget? Doesn’t I care too ?! In my head, I was talking about a strange bat.
The next morning, while I was working on my laptop next to the towels, I noticed this comment from a A reader named Elizabeth:
“At my bridal shower, the guests were asked to write a piece of advice for me, the bride. A card, written ‘anonymous’, said, ‘Remember you’re annoying, too.’ My first instinct was to think, What? How could that be? but it has been the best advice I have ever received! Every time I ask why my husband does something, or every time I get angry with him, I remember that he has had many moments of thinking / feeling the same with me. ”
What a moment of light bulb! In fact, even though Alex may forget about things like scarves, there are a lot of things about me that should drive me crazy. I have misophonyso some small noises frighten me; I sleep diagonally in bed; and I’m the worst chef in the world (was last year’s pumpkin pie somehow filled with scrambled eggs?). But after all, he loves me, I love him, and, as they say, everything comes out of the washing machine.
Thank you, Elizabeth, for this wonderful warning. And I’m curious: what other contact tips have served you well?
(Photos Barack Obama / Instagram, NBD.)